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 The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread. 
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
"It's like when you have an orgasm on your own, lying there watching some porn movie you bought on a drunken, lonely night in Soho. And you're lying there, everything is really great, you're getting totally turned on by these absurdly graphic images. Everything seems so right, then.. Bingo! You wake up. You're lying there sweating, desperately looking for the tissue, which you just know is still in your pocket, and the remote control which is somewhere on the floor. It's like walking in on yourself. You know, 'What are you doing?'... What the fuck are you doing?" - Tim Bisley, Spaced

We all have these moments of "Oh my God, I'm a prick" clarity, moments when we can see with total, objective insight what a complete twat we're being - though some of us probably have them less frequently than we should - so let's share them. I'll start:


Earlier I was preparing dinner while listening to Hear Nothing, See Nothing, Say Nothing (inspired by the ridiculous talk of Discharge being rubbish on the Unpopular Opinions thread), having a lovely time until I realised that I was standing in a flat in Guildford, cutting up a butternut squash with a Sabatier peeling knife I bought from a fancy kitchen-ware shop, singing "I won't subscribe to the system" and thinking about what I'd buy this weekend after payday.

I'm a fucking idiot.


Last edited by Painkiller on Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.



Tue Sep 27, 2011 6:03 pm
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Super Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
You made me laugh with that story. Also, that's basically me every day of my life, except I don't live in Guilford.

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 6:35 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Yes, Painkiller is a prick, the superficially ironic situation he found himself in has little bearing on this.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 6:37 pm
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Climate Control
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Singing along to that Foo Fighters song where the chorus goes ""I don't owe you anything" while sitting beside a mate I actually owed £50 to, does that count?


Tue Sep 27, 2011 6:39 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Solaris wrote:
Singing along to that Foo Fighters song where the chorus goes ""I don't owe you anything" while sitting beside a mate I actually owed £50 to, does that count?


It doesn't have to be singing inaccurate songs, just doing stuff that makes you realise what a cunt you are - wearing sunglasses indoors, maybe, or calling a girl "baby".


Tue Sep 27, 2011 7:08 pm
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
I went for a pee at work and went to spit in the urinal and accidentally spat on my penis.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 7:21 pm
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Space Ranger
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
not even God could keep count of my Prick moments.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:02 pm
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Last time I went dancing at a psy trance night, I kept having moments of clarity thinking "Steve, you can't dance and you look like a twat." I used to just take drugs to avoid caring, but I was skint at the time and my friend and I had shared a pint and some really shoddy speed. Spent the whole night just being slightly embarassed at myself.

Also, rock clubs. Not been in years, but last time I did I was starting to be one of the oldest guys in the room, and thinking I used to come here when I was at uni. In addition, last time I stood in circle, hands on knees, headbanging to something like Slayer with other grown men was another moment where I realised I am a twat.

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:26 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Zagreus wrote:
In addition, last time I stood in circle, hands on knees, headbanging to something like Slayer with other grown men was another moment where I realised I am a twat.


Absolutely. The great thing about Metal, though, is that when it really clicks you don't care about how much of a twat you're being until later.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:35 pm
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Space Ranger
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
I thought "Unpopular Opinions" kind of bore the subtitle "Oh god, I'm a prick", haha...


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:47 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
That's different - in this one you KNOW you're a cunt.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:48 pm
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Space Ranger
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Painkiller wrote:
Zagreus wrote:
In addition, last time I stood in circle, hands on knees, headbanging to something like Slayer with other grown men was another moment where I realised I am a twat.


Absolutely. The great thing about Metal, though, is that when it really clicks you don't care about how much of a twat you're being until later.


And the brotherhood- when you're at a show, and that awesome song takes you, and you look at some other grown man you've never met before and both yell "Metaaaallll!" while doing the devil horns.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:49 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Manowar in Birmingham was just like that, but not only did I not realise I was a prick at the time, I still haven't worked it out.


Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:50 pm
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
deadthyme wrote:
And the brotherhood- when you're at a show, and that awesome song takes you, and you look at some other grown man you've never met before and both yell "Metaaaallll!" while doing the devil horns.


Yep. I've done the can-can with a man I didn't even know at a Slayer gig whilst shouting along to Angel of Death.

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:07 pm
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Plenty of times. Too many have I looked in the mirror the next day and said "God, I'm a cunt" - but you know? I sleep at night!

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:13 pm
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
JCC wrote:
Earlier I went downstairs and there was a TV programme on about a house full of midgets cooking pasta and I was too drunk to know if I was actually seeing what I was seeing or if I was just imagining midgets because it's what I wanted to see deep down.


Was it about the 7 dwarf actors?


Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:13 pm
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Star Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
student union experiences of drinking too much, dancing to the metal half hour, but then keeping dancing when it turns to shit like take that. no matter how many times i tell myself i was being ironic, deep down i know the embarassing truth.

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:17 pm
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
None of this stuff about headbanging to Slayer or throwing the horns makes you a prick. Now, going to a gig and standing there with your arms folded, too cool to rock, that really does make you a prick.

Although getting tragically drunk, taking over the stereo at someones house warming, playing ...And Justice For All in its entirety and attempting to air guitar/drum/bass all at the same time, while bellowing along possibly makes me a prick.

"Come on you bastards, rock! Freeeedom no longer freees yowww!"


Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:19 pm
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Wretch wrote:
None of this stuff about headbanging to Slayer or throwing the horns makes you a prick. Now, going to a gig and standing there with your arms folded, too cool to rock, that really does make you a prick.

Although getting tragically drunk, taking over the stereo at someones house warming, playing ...And Justice For All in its entirety and attempting to air guitar/drum/bass all at the same time, while bellowing along possibly makes me a prick.

"Come on you bastards, rock! Freeeedom no longer freees yowww!"


Depends on how you're feeling that night. Sometimes I just can't be fucked to move and just want to enjoy the music. Doesn't mean I'm enjoying it any less. I paid to be there and I can stand how I like!

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Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:35 pm
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Super Trooper
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Post Re: The "Oh my God, I'm a prick" thread.
Wretch wrote:
None of this stuff about headbanging to Slayer or throwing the horns makes you a prick. Now, going to a gig and standing there with your arms folded, too cool to rock, that really does make you a prick.

Although getting tragically drunk, taking over the stereo at someones house warming, playing ...And Justice For All in its entirety and attempting to air guitar/drum/bass all at the same time, while bellowing along possibly makes me a prick.

"Come on you bastards, rock! Freeeedom no longer freees yowww!"

But if you came to my housewarming and did that I'd encourage you and probably join you in an impromptu air drumming with Lars session. Headbanging, throwing the horns etc is nothing to be embarassed about.


Wed Sep 28, 2011 1:22 am
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