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 Film Thread MkV 
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV


Have you seen this, Spiny (I'm asking as I assume nobody else would watch this kind of thing)? Looks a bit dodgy on the acting side but could be alright.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 12:55 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
There is no good reason for a man to see Fifty Shades......unless he is dragged to the cinema by his wife or girlfriend.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 4:25 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
To investigate how much the two main actors hate each other and how that comes across onscreen?


Mon Mar 09, 2015 4:41 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Watched Cross Of Iron earlier. It was alright, not worthy of the rave reviews. Coburn was mighty, though.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 4:48 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
MegaDave wrote:
To investigate how much the two main actors hate each other and how that comes across onscreen?


Depends how much you like the actors.

I don't know them from a hole in the ground.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 8:02 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
I'm grateful every day that my partner was not interested in it at all. Saved my miserly self $18.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 10:17 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Stalker by Tarkovsky.

Usual 100mph stuff from Andrei. Enjoyed it but prefer some of his other ones. He still seems a right miserable cunt though.

I don't even know what this 50 Shades of Gray shit is about, is it not just for half wits and simpletons? Like adults who read Harry Potter?


Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:10 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Stat_Rad wrote:
There is no good reason for a man to see Fifty Shades......unless he is dragged to the cinema by his wife or girlfriend.

I watched it with the wife, and if my experience was anything to go by, any man seeing it with his girlfriend/wife will be in for a very enjoyable evening indeed. }:D

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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Your review sounds more like a two or even one fist movie, Spiny?


Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:20 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
What type of fists are going on here?

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:24 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
WATP wrote:
I don't even know what this 50 Shades of Gray shit is about, is it not just for half wits and simpletons? Like adults who read Harry Potter?

If you want to see the worst thing ever published, then try and read the first couple of pages.

Horror novelist Shaun Hutson once said that it was after reading Night of the Crabs by Guy N Smith when he realised he could write, basically saying if Smith could get published anybody could.
Same principle here. All anyone wondering if they're talented enough to write has to do is pick up a copy of 50 Shades, say "kerching!" and start scribbling.

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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Chinese Whispers wrote:
What type of fists are going on here?

Quoting the film:
"No anal fisting".
"No vaginal fisting".

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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Myrddin wrote:
Your review sounds more like a two or even one fist movie, Spiny?

I don't do half fists but if I did, it would be a two and a half.



Even though it's hardly brilliant, It's still a much better film than I imagined it would be. I really did think it would be the worst thing I'd ever seen, but the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Ouija, Noah, I, Frankenstein, Hobbit 3, and the Robocop remake are all worse.

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Last edited by Spiny Norman on Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:37 am, edited 1 time in total.



Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:27 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Spiny Norman wrote:
WATP wrote:
I don't even know what this 50 Shades of Gray shit is about, is it not just for half wits and simpletons? Like adults who read Harry Potter?

If you want to see the worst thing ever published, then try and read the first couple of pages.

Horror novelist Shaun Hutson once said that it was after reading Night of the Crabs by Guy N Smith when he realised he could write, basically saying if Smith could get published anybody could.
Same principle here. All anyone wondering if they're talented enough to write has to do is pick up a copy of 50 Shades, say "kerching!" and start scribbling.


Have you read Night of the Crabs? I'm curious, though not curious enough to have to pay for it.


Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:37 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Of course I have. :lol:
It was one of the first horror novels I bought. I must have been around 12 years old and I still read it occasionally now. I had every one of Smith's books at one point (some even autographed) but I lost half of them in a house move.

From the book titles to the writing itself, he's so completely shit that he's brilliant. Although, that said, he has accidentally written a handful of genuinely good books.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:42 am
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
WATP wrote:
Stalker by Tarkovsky.

Usual 100mph stuff from Andrei. Enjoyed it but prefer some of his other ones. He still seems a right miserable cunt though.

I don't even know what this 50 Shades of Gray shit is about, is it not just for half wits and simpletons? Like adults who read Harry Potter?


Stalker is 4 fists at a minimum.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 12:14 pm
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Spiny Norman wrote:
Of course I have. :lol:
It was one of the first horror novels I bought. I must have been around 12 years old and I still read it occasionally now. I had every one of Smith's books at one point (some even autographed) but I lost half of them in a house move.

From the book titles to the writing itself, he's so completely shit that he's brilliant. Although, that said, he has accidentally written a handful of genuinely good books.


Isn't shaun hutson equally shit? Slugs basically being a poor man's version of Herbert's Rats. And then at some point he ceased to right horror and turned everything into east end gangster books. That and the fact every cunting page he told his how his characters cannot talk, they rasp.


Mon Mar 09, 2015 12:26 pm
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Hutson is hilarious, he looks like Tommy vances slightly Mong brother.

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Mon Mar 09, 2015 12:27 pm
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Dr Yail Bloor wrote:
Hutson is hilarious, he looks like Tommy vances slightly Mong brother.


just taken a look at his website. Entertaining for all the wrong reasons.

I think he was lucky in that he was around at a time when horror novels were big business so some publishers were looking for the next King/Herbert etc. I remember every book store had the same list: Barker, Herbert, Hutson, King, Koontz, Laymon, Lovecraft, Lumley and Rice. If you were lucky maybe Campbell and Straub.

To look at those names now, well, says it all.


Mon Mar 09, 2015 12:53 pm
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Post Re: Film Thread MkV
Matsui Rena wrote:
Isn't shaun hutson equally shit? Slugs basically being a poor man's version of Herbert's Rats. And then at some point he ceased to right horror and turned everything into east end gangster books. That and the fact every cunting page he told his how his characters cannot talk, they rasp.

Hutson is/was a slightly better writer than Smith, but not nearly as much fun.
Everything up to Assassin is worth a read, but like you said, after that he became a gangster writer and my interest died quicker than one of his slug victims.




Sol, I haven't seen The Prototype, but after watching the trailer I don't think I need to either as it pretty much looks to have shown the entire film in three minutes.


Crom, your Cheating Housewives review really makes me want to watch the film. Is it part of a series? Is it black and white with subtitles?

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