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 Best song with the stupidest lyrics 
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Super Trooper
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Post Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Got to be 'Ramble On'. That "Twas in the darkest depths of MORDOR... I met a girl" bit, and "GOLLUM! The EEEEVVVIIILLL one..." crack me up every time.

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Sun Apr 17, 2011 11:41 am
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Storm Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Basically, anything by T-Rex from 1970 - 1973. Silly, but gloriously so.


Mon Apr 18, 2011 1:22 am
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Quite a lot of Maiden's stuff has some terrible lyrics.

Even Bruce takes the piss out of the whole 'dying swans' bit of Brave New World.

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:45 am
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Star Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics


Trapped in my room
Sodomizing a bitch
I open a smirnoff
And start to drink

After two litres
I go to the streets
Totaly drunk
And fainted to the ground

Through my veins
United with my blood
The alcohol is running wild

I can't stop
This pleasure to my flesh
'cause it turns me so excited

Now the walls are white
People around me
My end, in a hospital bed
Into the alcoholic coma

Not just graduates but Doctors of Philosophy in Metallenglisch! Cool tune though...

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 9:41 am
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Super Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
dog fasion disco need an epic mention

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 9:51 am
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Space Ranger
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Oh geez where to start? Venom have a lot of good songs with stupid lyrics, but the lyrics completely ruin the song "Muscle". You lose an IQ point every time you listen to it. But it's not that great of a song musically anyway, so I guess it doesn't count.

Carnivore have a lot of really awesome songs with terrible lyrics. Same with S.O.D..


Mon Apr 18, 2011 12:12 pm
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Super Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
deadthyme wrote:
Oh geez where to start? Venom have a lot of good songs with stupid lyrics, but the lyrics completely ruin the song "Muscle". You lose an IQ point every time you listen to it. But it's not that great of a song musically anyway, so I guess it doesn't count.

Carnivore have a lot of really awesome songs with terrible lyrics. Same with S.O.D..

it was delibrate with carnivore and sod though.

cannibal corpse had some daft lyrics, so did obituary.
shakira has fucking daft lyrics.

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 1:57 pm
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Star Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Prog rock of course has some nonsense, i'm sure Chantler will have some corkers, but try this offering from Yes: taken from the Tales from Topographic Oceans album...

The Revealing Science of God - Dance of the Dawn
SHRUTIS: The Revealing Science of God can be seen as an ever-opening flower
in which simple truths emerge examining the complexities and magic of the past
and how we should not forget the song that has been left to us to hear. The
knowledge of God is a search, constant and clear.


Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
Cahsed amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
Dawn of thought transfered through moments of days undersearching earth
Revealing corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with
purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
Won't to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting.

Talk tothe sunlight caller
Soft summer mover distance mine

Called out a tune but I never saw the face
Heard but not replaced
I ventured to talk, but I never lost my place

Cast out a spell rendered for the light of day
Lost in lights array
I ventured to see, as the sound began to play

What happened to this song we once knew so well
Signed promise for moments caught within the spell
I must have waited all my life for this
Moment moment

The future poised with the splendour just begun
The light we were as one
And crowded through the curtains of liquid into sun

And for a moment when our world had filled the skies
Magic turned our eyes
To feast on the treasure set for our strange device

What happened to wonders we once knew so well
Did we forget what happened surely we can tell
We must have waited all our lives for this
Moment moment moment

Star light movements in seasons
Release forward
Tallest rainbow
Sun shower seasons
Life flower reasons

They move fast, they tell me,
But I just can't believe that I can feel it
There's someone, to tell you,
amidthe challenge we look around in unison with you

Getting over overhanging trees
Let them rape the forest
Thoughts would send our fusion
Clearly to be home

Getting over wars we do not mean
Or so it seems so clearly
Sheltered with our passion
Clearly to be home

They move fast, they tell me,
But I just can't believe they really mean to
There's someone, to tell you,
And I just can't believe our song will leave you
Skyline teacher
Warland seeker
Send out poison
Cast iron leader

And through the rhythm of moving slowly
Sent through the rhythm work out the story
Move over glory to sons of old fighters past.
Young Christians see it from the beginning
Old people feel it that's what they're saying
Move over glory to sons of old fighters past.

The move fast, they tell me,
But I just can't believe they really mean to
There's someone, to tell you,
A course towards a universal season

Getting over overhanging trees let them
Rape the forest, they might stand and leave them
Clearly to be home
Getting over wars we do not mean
We charm the movement suffers
Call out all our memories
Clearly to be home

We've moved fast
We need love
A part we offer is our only freedom

What happened to this song we once knew so well
Signed promise for moments caught within the spell
We must have waited all our lives for this
Moment moment

Past present movers moments we'll process the future, but only
To touch him we know, send flowered rainbows
That chased flowers of dark and lights of songs
To you, show all we feel for and know of, cast round,
Youth is the truth accepting that reasons will relive
And breathe hope and chase and love
For you and you and you

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 2:23 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
No one can say ELP in this thread because it's simply not true.

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 5:29 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics


Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:06 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics


"I always felt really bad for the non-straightedge kids. Not just because they were destroying their brains with drugs and alcohol, but because they never got to take part in any of the good sing-a-longs"

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 9:07 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics


Goin' home, late last night
Suddenly I got a fright
Yeah I looked throught the window
And surprised what I saw
A Fairy with boots on dancin' with a dwarf
Alright now!

Fairies wear boots and now you gotta believe me
Yeah I saw it, I saw it
I tell you no lie

Yeah Fairies had boots and you gotta believe me
I saw it, I saw it with my own two eyes
Woah right now!

So I went to the doctor to see what he could give me
He said Son, son, you've gone too far
'Cause smokin' and trippin' is all that you do
Yeah!

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 10:57 pm
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Super Trooper
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
As my brother pointed out to me, the last couplet of that is maybe the stupidest two lines in rock. It's all rhyming couplets right through, until the end when Ozzy apparently can't think of anything to rhyme with "do", so he just goes, "YEEEEEAAAAHHH!" Brilliant!

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Mon Apr 18, 2011 11:50 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
'War Pigs' needs a mention just because of the 'masses'/'masses' double rhyme which he seems to think no one will notice.


Tue Apr 19, 2011 12:12 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Any bids for any Clawfinger song?

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Tue Apr 19, 2011 12:40 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
DCI Gene Hunt wrote:
Any bids for any Clawfinger song?

I've had it up to here with your shit and your piss.

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Tue Apr 19, 2011 1:12 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
DCI Gene Hunt wrote:
Any bids for any Clawfinger song?

"Do this
Do that
Come here
You twat."

Poetry.

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Tue Apr 19, 2011 1:19 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Rise and Fall - Helloween

(Including, but not limited too...)
Romeo loved his juliet, their parents told them stop
It all turned out peculiar, he couldn't get it up

The king of los angeles bought himself a teddy bear
The queen became shameless and did it with a chair



Tue Apr 19, 2011 3:55 pm
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Spiny Norman wrote:
I've had it up to here with your shit and your piss.


:lol:

Zak Tell used to work in an old people's home, so there is some significance attached to it.


Fri Apr 29, 2011 9:57 pm
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Darth Fucking Vader
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Post Re: Best song with the stupidest lyrics
Every Metal song ever.


Fri Apr 29, 2011 10:05 pm
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